11:31 p.m.

That’s it! All 60 Super Bowl ads, reviewed neatly for your convenience. Check back soon, as I’ll compile these results into my Top Ten and Bottom Whatever. Thanks for reading – I’ll see you again here soon!

11:29 p.m.

Robinhood – “We Are All Investors”

This is another nice ad that shoots for an inspiring message but ultimately just fades into the woodwork. On top of that, Robinhood hasn’t had a great run as of late and needed to do a lot more damage control than this ad provided. The bigger story tonight was Reddit’s five-second ad that ran locally in nine large markets across the country, touting the moment when it disrupted Wall Street. The free press that ad is generating will make a much bigger splash than this ad ever will. Grade: C-. Ad Meter Grade: 4.

Amazon – “Alexa’s Body”

This ad was so greatly anticipated, and it took almost to the end of the game for us to see it on-screen. The wait was worth it. Michael B. Jordan serves as the perfect vessel for Alexa, as evidenced by countless of my students who swooned over the ad when I screened it in my classroom. This has been my pick for the Ad Meter title since I first saw it, and nothing has changed. It combines humor, a clever celebrity endorsement and a great use of the product in a very unique use. When Ad Meter finally wraps (and it’s taking a very long time for it to tie things up tonight), this should be the ad that’s sitting on the top. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Guaranteed Rate – “Believe You Will”

Our last ad of the night again shoots for inspiration, and it’s not really bad. It’s just that it’s also not really good, either. Guaranteed Rate tells a great story, but it’s hard to make a connection between Ryan Newman and a mortgage company. On a night when Rocket Mortgage slayed its marketplace, Guaranteed Rate’s entry come across as fairly paltry, in spite of the inspirational message.  Grade: B-. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

11:15 p.m.

Klarna – “The Four Quarter-Sized Cowboys”

Maya Rudolph (times four) introduces us to Klarna, a service that allows its users to pay using an installment program. Until this ad, I didn’t even know they existed. With so many traditional advertisers taking a hiatus on the big game, Klarna skillfully used the opening to introduce itself to the world.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

Bass Pro Shops and Cabelas – “Get Back to Nature”

Bass Pro Shops tries to use its space to do what Jeep and Anheuser-Busch did with much more success. It’s a nice ad, and we all probably should spend less time indoors and more time in the great outdoors. But this ad is definitely aimed at a niche market (like many of my family and friends) and its message will have little appeal to people who don’t like to hike and camp. Grade: C+. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

11:08 p.m.

Jeep – “The Middle”

OK, so maybe not the most resonant message of the night. Jeep’s 2-minute spot about meeting in the middle is pure gold. Again, it’s not going to even challenge for the Ad Meter, but it strikes a tone that is desperately needed in our country. It beckons us to come to the center, where we all can meet and talk and be part of the greater family of Americans. On an advertising scale, it suffers from the lack of a true product tie-in, but I’m guessing that Jeep didn’t really care about that this year. Why else spend $11 million on a commercial that doesn’t really feature their product as much as it does a chapel in the center of the country? Kudos to Jeep, and thanks for the inspiration. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

Michelob Ultra – “All-Star Cast”

What can you do if you don’t want to spend a lot of money on celebrity endorsements, but you still want to get credit for having them? Use imposters. Michelob deftly places celebrity-doubles from wannabe Serena Williams to never-was Sylvester Stallone, while placing Don Cheadle next to his double on a yacht. It’s a nice way of saying their product is genuine and using a lot of creativity to do it. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

Disney+ – “The Disney Bundle”

Disney clearly doesn’t care about being original with this one – the point is hopefully to get people to hop onto three different streaming services under one banner. (Shows you what I know – I didn’t even realize that Disney owned Hulu until today.) This was a very expensive way to promote the services, and wedged in-between two much better ads, there’s a good chance it will be lost in the shuffle. Grade: C-. Ad Meter Grade: 3.

10:54 p.m.

Jeep – “The Middle”

OK, so maybe not the most resonant message of the night. Jeep’s 2-minute spot about meeting in the middle is pure gold. Again, it’s not going to even challenge for the Ad Meter, but it strikes a tone that is desperately needed in our country. It beckons us to come to the center, where we all can meet and talk and be part of the greater family of Americans. On an advertising scale, it suffers from the lack of a true product tie-in, but I’m guessing that Jeep didn’t really care about that this year. Why else spend $11 million on a commercial that doesn’t really feature their product as much as it does a chapel in the center of the country? Kudos to Jeep, and thanks for the inspiration. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

Michelob Ultra – “All-Star Cast”

What can you do if you don’t want to spend a lot of money on celebrity endorsements, but you still want to get credit for having them? Use imposters. Michelob deftly places celebrity-doubles from wannabe Serena Williams to never-was Sylvester Stallone, while placing Don Cheadle next to his double on a yacht. It’s a nice way of saying their product is genuine and using a lot of creativity to do it. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

10:47 p.m.

Cadillac – “ScissorHandsFree”

Cadillac’s rare entry in the Super Bowl borrows from the classic movie, “Edward Scissorhands,” but this time, it’s Edgar, and he’s similarly challenged. Fortunately for Edgar, the new Cadillac EV is self-driving, so his hands won’t cause any problems. It’s a good use of product-in-use, as well as a good use of the film. And Timothy Chalamet is a good substitute for Johnny Depp, too.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

Anheuser-Busch – “Let’s Grab a Beer”

I’ve liked this one since I first saw it. So why is it rated at only an 8? It’s not especially unique, and it doesn’t have a lot of elements in it that make it hugely memorable. But this year, as I’ve been separated from family and friends for so much of the year, getting together for a simple drink sounds like a very good idea. It doesn’t have to be a beer (but in A-B’s case, it usually is), but they’re right – getting together for a soft drink or a frosty mug is about more than the beverage – it’s about the need for human interaction. We do need each other, and while this ad won’t win any awards, it has the most resonant message of the night. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

10:31 p.m.

WeatherTech – “We Never Left”

The second WeatherTech entry of the evening is a feel-good spot that plays to national pride, and it’s moderately effective. Again, if you want a nice floor mat, I’m sure WeatherTech is a great option, but their ads are far to easy to forget. Grade: C. Ad Meter Grade: 4.

Squarespace – “5 to 9”

Who would have thought that Dolly Parton would be this marketable at this stage in her career? Her signature hit, “9 to 5” is flipped for this ad, where we are told that Squarespace is perfect for our home-based jobs that we work from “5 to 9.” Other than Dolly’s song, there’s not much here to latch on to. Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 6.

NFL – “It Takes All of Us”

Instead of a cool, original ad, the NFL retreads the opening spot that it ran in the pregame. It’s still inspirational, and true NFL fans will appreciate the appearance of Vince Lombardi (or at least Russ Hutchison, who played the legendary coach) in the spot. It’s nice, but it’s a far cry from the Ad Meter-contending ads they’ve posted in the past. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

10:19 p.m.

Amazon – “Coming 2 America”

Straight-to-streaming movies are becoming a very big deal, so Amazon is really playing up it’s debut of the “Coming to America” sequel. It’s a movie ad, it’s kind of funny, it’s pretty much meh. I have Amazon, so I’m sure I’ll watch, but this ad won’t have much to do with it.  Grade: B-. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

Cheetos – “It Wasn’t Me”

Let’s get one thing straight – Ashton Kutcher can’t sing, and I’m sure he’s aware of that. That didn’t stop Cheetos from having him do it in their ad that features Kutcher and his wife, Mila Kunis, along with Shaggy, who is (for some reason) at the Kutcher-Kunis home. Ashton is certain that Mila has been poaching his Cheetos, and in spite of the orange evidence on her fingers, he’s convinced. It’s nice enough and should sell a few bags of cheesy crisps.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

10:14 p.m.

It’s official – the Tampa Bay Bucs are NFL champs for the second time! This was quite an upset – the Bucs made Patrick Mahomes look like something other than Patrick Mahomes. Back to the ads.

10:10 p.m.

Microban – “Touch After Touch”

Another 15-second ad, another ad quickly forgotten. I’m sure Microban works really well, and people might really want some of it in this age of COVID-19. But you have to sell a lot of cans of Microban to pay for a $2.7 million ad. Grade: D+. Ad Meter Grade: 3.

Fiverr – “Opportunity Knocks”

When you’re advertising in the Super Bowl for the first time, you have to make a pretty big splash in order to be memorable. Fiverr has a very cool service, and their commercial tonight looks very cool. But it’s far from a big splash. It’s nice, but in this game, nice guys definitely don’t finish first. You have to be bigger, bolder, funnier, more touching than anyone else, and this didn’t approach that standard. Grade: B+. Ad Meter Grade: 6.

9:52 p.m.

Rocket Mortage – “Pretty Sure”

The folks at Rocket Mortgage were “pretty sure” we’d love this campaign, and they’re right! Tracy Morgan is perfect for this spot, which continues to tell potential homeowners that being pretty sure is a far cry from being certain. I’m certain that Rocket Mortgage will be one of the night’s big winners. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Draft Kings – “4^th Quarter Prediction Challenge”

Draft Kings definitely wants us to sign up for their challenge, so much so that they’re willing to pay $5.5 million tonight. There has to be a lot of money in this challenge for Draft Kings. But there’s not much reason for anyone to remember another boring 15-second spot. Grade: D-. Ad Meter Grade: 2.

9:44 p.m.

T-Mobile – “Family Drama 5G”

Tracy Morgan and his mother have become advertising gold. This year’s ad has them on opposite sides of a flag football contest, with Travis Kelce playing as a ringer on Mrs. Morgan’s team. This ad tells me very little about T-Mobile’s service, but they apparently say I shouldn’t trust my family drama to Verizon or AT&T. It’s a lot of fun and continues T-Mobile’s success in the big game.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Michelob Ultra – “Happy”

Michelob has done a decent job in recent years, and this ad isn’t bad, but it doesn’t leave you with much to remember once it’s over. Basically, it questions our reasons for happiness and tries to tie our happiness to their beer. It made a good impression, but I’m still trying to remember what they said.  Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 6.

9:34 p.m.

Personal note: I’m getting very tired, but I’ll soldier on and get all of these done tonight. Today I’ve graded, turned in work for a course, rated a lot of ads, written reviews and cooked chili for dinner. It’s been a full day. Not that I’m complaining, but if these are coming slower, it’s for a pretty good reason. By the way – the chili turned to be a very tasty batch. Now, back the ratings!

9:21 p.m.

Verizon – “Can’t Blame the Lag”

Verizon’s big effort this year is definitely entertaining. Samuel L. Jackson – or at least a digital version of him – admonishes gamers (or at least games) that if they’re having problems with their games, it’s not Verizon’s fault. The best moment is when JuJu Smith-Schuster of the Pittsburgh Steelers has his giant fish swallow Samuel whole at the end of the commercial. Clever and memorable.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Uber Eats – “Wayne’s World”

Uber Eats makes its Super Bowl debut by hearkening back to an era of old, when Wayne and Garth broadcast to us from Wayne’s basement. This ad clicks on so many levels that it should be studied. Wayne and Garth appeal to older viewers. Cardi B appeals to younger viewers. There are shameless plugs that are wink-wink, nudge-nudged to us, and there’s a tip of the hat to Tik Tok. There’s no way you don’t remember Uber Eats if you watched this ad.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

8:56 p.m.

Paramount+ – “Sweet Victory”

The new streaming service completes its trifecta with another great ad, this time featuring Patrick Stewart as the host – who reveals he has been the voice behind all three of the ads. (It wasn’t a well-kept secret; he has one of the most recognizable voices in the entertainment world). This is the least effective of Paramount’s four ads, but by this point, they didn’t need a home run. It works well enough, especially when Stewart reminds us that Parmount+ is, indeed, a streaming service.  Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

8:54 p.m.

Vroom – “Dealership Pain”

This one sits on the border between disturbing and entertaining. A man visits an auto dealer, who resorts to torture to sell the man his car. Literally flipping the page, the man comes back to the Vroom experience and sees that it’s so much easier than going to a dealer. It’s effective, and it has me rethinking ever going back to a used car lot. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

Jimmy John’s – “Meet the King”

Cue up another first-timer in Jimmy John’s, which employs both Brad Garrett and the Hollies’ “Long Cool Woman in a Black Dress” to show us the difference between meat “made by science” and Jimmy John’s fresh cold-cuts. This is mildly humorous and a decent first effort, but far from the more memorable ads of the evening. Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 7.

T-Mobile – “Rockstar 5G”

So this is how Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani got together. T-Mobile pitchman (for the night) Adam Levine apparently wasn’t using T-Mobile the day he talked to Gwen about her dating interests. That’s how he mistakenly put Gwen and Blake together. This was a clever use of pop culture and what’s become a necessity – reliable cellular data. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

8:32 p.m.

Dr. Squatch – “You’re Not a Dish”

I’ve apparently been hiding under a rock lately because before this commercial, I’d never heard about Dr. Squatch. Their entry is fairly humorous and is a nice introduction for most Americans to a product that’s often overlooked – men’s bath soap. Given that it’s only geared toward guys, a lot of people might not warm to the ad, but it’s still appealing overall. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

8:31 p.m.

Mercari – “Get Your Used Things”

Someone please tell me why 15-second commercials are a thing in the Super Bowl. Mercari plunked down about $2.8 million for this mini ad, which for the life of me I still can’t remember. It’s something about getting something from somebody. I think. Grade: D-. Ad Meter Grade: 2.

Draft Kings – “4^th Quarter Prediction Challenge”

Reference the previous post about 15-second commercials. The only thing Draft Kings has over the Mercari ad is that it offers a chance to win some money. That is, if you saw this fleeting commercial and were motivated to enter their contest. Which I wasn’t, because I was writing this blog. Maybe you were. If you win some money, let me know. Grade: D-. Ad Meter Grade: 2.

8:25 p.m.

Paramount+ – “Ice Bridge ‘Crack’”

The journey up Paramount Mountain continues, but is impeded by a giant crack in the ice. More celebrity cameos abound, capped by the appearance of MTV’s Beavis and Butthead, who get a kick out of someone using the word “crack.” It’s not entirely funny at first, but as they continue to laugh, it becomes infectious. If I didn’t already have the service, I’d definitely be looking into it.  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

TurboTax – “Spreading Tax Expertise”

There’s nothing like desks rolling down your street to get your attention. At least TurboTax thinks so. This was a cute effort with a little humor and some non-offensive music to get us to use an online tax service. It’s not amazing, but it’s a solid Super Bowl effort. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

Tide – “Jason Alexander Hoodie”

Tide has become one of the more creative and humorous advertisers each year. This time, they use comedic actor Jason Alexander (and his ability to make a lot of different faces) to demonstrate that your clothes are dirtier than you think they are. It’s funny, and it gets a lot of laughs throughout. It might not win the countdown, but hopefully fans will agree to put it somewhere near the top. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

8:21 p.m.

E-Trade – “Workout”

E-Trade has always loved using kids to sell their services, and this year’s ad follow in that trend. This time, we have a kid training to become world class, and it’s a reminder to us that we, too can get in shape this year. Yeah, right. At least our finances can be in good shape. Clever and worthwhile.  Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 7.

Hellman’s – “Fairy Godmayo”

Hellman’s is another first-time entry, with Amy Schumer pitching the creamy spread. I’m not a big Amy fan, but there’s a little bit of humor and a lot of product tie-in. It wasn’t great, but it was ultimately effective, and that’s all that advertising is supposed to be, right?  Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

8:12 p.m.

Toyota – “Upstream”

Sometimes, touching is perfect enough. No celebrities, no flash, no dash – just a simple swimmer doing her thing in the world’s most unusual pool. Paralympian Jessica Long makes her Super Bowl debut in Toyota’s latest ad, and she makes a big impression. No, there’s not a car anywhere to be found, but the emotional effect sure makes you feel good about their company.  Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

7:59 p.m.

Rocket Mortage – “Certain is Better”

This one wasn’t released prior to the game, but it’s going to be one of the night’s big winners. Tracy Morgan reminds us that there’s big difference between “pretty sure” and certain – and he uses a lot of shocking examples to drive that point home. I had a lot of fun with this ad, and that’s a great way to get people to remember you when the Lombardi Trophy is being hoisted. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Oatly – “For Humans”

I don’t want to write much about this one simply because it looked like they decided to make this ad in a cow pasture last week. A guy with a Casio keyboard singing off-pitch and annoying me about oat milk. They’d have done better to hire the Real Men of Genius singer to croon about their beverage. Instead, welcome, Annoying Guy, to the bottom of the countdown. Grade: D-. Ad Meter Grade: 2.

Huggies – “We Got You, Baby”

This is the first time I can ever remember a baby diaper being included in the Super Bowl. That’s the effect of not having Budweiser, Coca-Cola and Pepsi. The thing is, Huggies did a nice job with this ad. Ut was cute and a little bit humorous, and they represented their product in a cool way. Unlike the previous ad, this first-time effort was Super Bowl worthy. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

7:43 p.m.

Skechers – “Tony Romo”

I’m really not sure why Skechers continues to joing the Super Bowl parade. The only thing this ad has going for it is Tony Romo, and that’s mainly because he’s part of the broadcast team. Skechers ads are always super-forgettable, and this one is not much different. It’s for shoes that I don’t buy.  Grade: B-. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

WeatherTech – “WeatherTech Family”

WeatherTech must have their core audience dialed in, and they must know that their people love these ads. Otherwise, it doesn’t make much sense that they spend upwards of $5 million for a spot that most viewers won’t remember by halftime. I’m sure they make good floormats, but using their “family” to promote the company doesn’t tell me anything about the product. But it seems like a cool company.  Grade: C. Ad Meter Grade: 4.

7:34 p.m.

Bud Light Seltzer – “Last Year’s Lemons”

It’s always nice to see an ad that uses current events and gets creative with them. Bud Light’s new Lemonade seltzer apparently was made from the enormous amount of lemons that the tumult of 2020 handed us. Even without a celebrity cameo, this one reaches up toward the top of the ad chart. One question – how many lemons did they use in the making of this commercial? If you find out, let me know! Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Miracle Gro – “Keep Growing”

Once again, an ad that would be really good on a normal day is lost a little bit in the Super Bowl shuffle. Miracle Gro has a cool contest, and if you have a yard you’d like to improve, you should enter it. Martha Stewart, Carl Weathers and John Travolta encourage you to do so. (Yes, that a very bald John Travolta at the end – I wouldn’t have recognized him had his name not been mentioned.) Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 7.

7:32 p.m.

Dexcom – “Rant”

Most ads for prescriptions and medical devices are pretty dry – until now. Nick Jonas reminds us that in a world that is defined by its technological advances, the need for diabetics pricking their fingers is in the past. There’s some clever humor in here, as well as a strong connection to the product (which, by the way, monitors your blood sugar under the skin – for $299 a month). It’s not likely to appeal to everyone, but diabetics will probably be paying close attention. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

Mountain Dew – “Major Melon Bottles”

Mountain Dew employs John Cena to bring some fun to your screen – and a chance to get rich. If you slow down the ad and count every single Mountain Dew bottle – and Tweet that amount – you could win $1 million. That’s one way to make sure people remember your product. (It’s a melon-flavored soda, by the way.) Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 59

Indeed – “The Rising”

This is a really sweet ad – that I completely forgot about in-between my initial rating of it and this writing about it. The music does inspire about and Indeed gamely tries to remind us about their ability to get people jobs. In this climate when so many are out of work, it may connect better with them than it did with me. Again, I forgot about it pretty quickly after seeing it. Grade: B. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

State Farm – “Drake From State Farm”

We got a lot of hype about this ad, from the celebrity cameos to who was behind the camera. And it was a really good ad – good enough, maybe to sniff the top of the Ad Meter. But I was honestly expecting more. That’s the problem with Super Bowl ads – sometimes great isn’t good enough. This was a cute way of keeping the Jake from State Farm thing going, but it was a bit below the hype. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

7:13 p.m.

Pringles – “Space Return”

Pringles continues to try and get us to stack our chips into flavorful stacks, and it’s a fairly recognizable trope at this point. This time, they use the return of astronauts to Earth to show us how forgettable they are compared to the flavor of stacked Pringles. There’s some humor, and it mostly works. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 7.

Bud Light – “Bud Light Legends”

This is one of the more clever and creative efforts this year. Instead of coming up with a new way to market their beer, Bud Light resurrected practically every previous effort in their Super Bowl history, from Cedric the Entertainer to the Bud Knight to Bud Bowl to the Real Men of Genius singer. (He has a name, by the way – Dave Bickler). Everything here is pretty much spot-on. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Chiptole – “Can a Burrito Change the World?”

Chipotle uses social responsibility to attempt to get us to choose them as a dining option. They are socially conscious about how they plant, water and run their business. It’s a nice ad – outside of the Super Bowl. Wedged in-between humorous and heart-rending heavy-hitters, it’ll be forgotten. Grade: B-. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

7:06 p.m.

Marvel Studios – “The Falcon and the Winter Soldier”

Another movie ad, but this one fares somewhat better because it’s for a long-awaited Marvel entry that will be premiering on Disney Plus. There’s a lot of action to go with the anticipation, but ultimately it’s still a movie ad. I’ll watch it when it premieres, but until then, I won’t remember this ad much. Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 7.

Doordash – “The Neighborhood”

This ad had so much promise – I mean, EVERYONE recognizes Big Bird, right? The problem is, I had very little idea about which delivery service was being promoted. Maybe they mentioned Doordash earlier in the ad, but I missed it. For the entire rest of the ad, I waited for Doordash to appear, and it didn’t show up until the last seconds. This one was cute, but ultimately is about missed potential. Grade: A-. Ad Meter Grade: 6.

Doritos – “Flat Matthew”

Thank God it’s not another dreary Lincoln ad. Instead, Matthew McConaughey tells us about how “flat” he’s felt lately – literally. That point is driven home by an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel’s show (with Mindy Kaling). Only Doritos can make him feel whole again. It’s funny and makes you hungry for the 3D chips. (And the graphics are incredible!) Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

GM – “No Way Norway”

Leave it to Will Farrell to bring the funny when we really need it. One of our favorite over-the-top comics is put out that Norway is better at making electric vehicles than we are in the United States. He sets out to let Norway know that he won’t put up with that, with the help of Awkwafina and fellow SNL-er Keenan Thompson. This was a fun one-minute journey that I was looking forward to continuing. I kind of expect there to be more ads that play off of this later in the game. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

Paramount+ – “Hooked It”

Remember, I told you about great? This is it. Paramount+ reminds us that it will be bringing us content from across a broad spectrum, including entertainment and sports. In this spot, Spock (from Star Trek: Discovery) is tending to a puppet (from Comedy Central’s Crank Yankers) who has a frozen arm. When he says an amputation is needed, PGA winner Bryson Dechambeau is more than happy to perform the task with one of his signature drives. It’s topped by commentary from CBS football announcers Jim Nance and Tony Romo. The ad checks so many boxes that it’s hard to deny its near perfection. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 10.

6:58 p.m.

Inspiration4 – “Join”

SpaceX enters the Super Bowl space race with a commercial touting the first civilian space mission. It’s an interesting that doesn’t really tell us that much about what they’re offering. They just want you to visit their website (which is provided) to find out more. Many might assume they have to pony up big bucks to be part of this, so it might have been good to tell us that there’s a no-obligation raffle that is raising money for St. Jude’s to award a seat on the mission. Had they been a little more creative, this ad could have had a lot more appeal. Grade: B-. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

6:57 p.m.

Logitech – “Defy Logic”

My students loved this ad when I showed it. It’s eye-popping, catchy and fun – but they had no clue what the advertiser was selling. We get it – Logitech is letting you be whoever you want to be. But what’s the product? That part is mostly left out of the equation. Grade: C+. Ad Meter Grade: 5.

Paramount+ – “Roll Call”

CBS is using its role as broadcast host of the Super Bowl to tout the change of their All-Access streaming service to Paramount+. It might have been gratuitous if it wasn’t so effective. This is the first of several ads the new service will be running, and it’s oddly not the most effective of the ones you’ll be seeing. Don’t get me wrong – it’s good, but it’s not great. Great will be coming later in the broadcast. Grade: A+. Ad Meter Grade: 9.

6:51 p.m.

Universal Pictures – “Old”

Our journey into the world of Super Bowl ads begins with …. a commercial for a movie. These are always among the most forgettable ads of the evening, and this one is no different. Sure, it looks like a cool movie about people growing old on an island. But that happens every day on islands around my home state of Florida. Grade: C. Ad Meter Grade: 4.

M&Ms – “Come Together”

M&Ms scores with this ad about using their candies to apologize for the embarrassing moments in life. The funniest moment comes when a lady gives them to someone with apologies for calling her a Karen – only to find out that the other person’s name is actually Karen. It’s not at the top of the charts, but the folks at M&Ms should be happy with this one. Grade: A. Ad Meter Grade: 8.

3:07 p.m.

T-minus three and a half hours and counting! Game time for Super Bowl LV is just around the corner, and we will once again be here live blogging every commercial during the big game. My formula will once again be driving my ratings, and it still taps in heavily to Aristotle’s three modes of persuasion – pathos, ethos and logos.

Great – and even good – commercials should make us relate to our emotions of humor, sadness, joy, anger. That is never more true than in Super Bowl ads, which this year are going for a reported $5.5 million for a 30-second spot. (That’s a little below last year’s, pre-COVID amount.) What’s amazing about Super Bowl ads is that a really good commercial will suffer by comparison. It can be really good, but not great, and that will cause it to be lost in the shuffle. Nice, touching ads that don’t hit the “home run” will often be forgotten by the end of the game.

I’ve already watched and rated 37 of the ads, but I’ll save my final judgment for during the game when they actually air. Please note that I’ll be giving each of the ads a letter grade and a USA Today Ad Meter grade. Again, just because a commercial gets an Ad Meter 4 doesn’t mean it’s horrible – it’s just that much below the ads that get an 8, 9 or 10. My letter grades will tend to be high because I grade them like a teacher – perhaps because I actually am a teacher.

Just as last year, this year’s ads are again rating very well. So far, my average grade is a solid A. USA Today estimates about 62 ads this year, so there are still a lot of good (and maybe bad) commercials waiting to be evaluated. (Thank God that at least we won’t have any political ads this year from either side!)

Come back frequently, because the updates will take place as often as the ads air. I’ll see you once the game begins. Here’s to a great game, and even better ads!