Read
Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children…
Deuteronomy 4:9
Reflect
A number of years ago, Emory University did a study that surveyed 600 Atlanta-area high school seniors and their parents regarding the use of drugs and alcohol. Not surprisingly, it found that parents tended to greatly underestimate how involved their children were in the use of various substances.
While only 35 percent of parents believed their children had consumed alcohol in the past month, 67 percent of the students admitted to drinking during that same time. And while just 3 percent of parents thought their children had smoked marijuana, 28 percent of the seniors said they had used it in the past 30 days.
Those numbers are older now, and in some ways the national picture has changed. Teen alcohol use has declined significantly since many of us were young, and that is good news. Alcohol may not be the default temptation for students the way it once was.
But that does not mean the problem has disappeared. It has changed shape.
In schools today, we see that change in the form of vapes, THC products and edibles. Students sneak vapes onto campus because they are small, easy to hide and hard to detect. Marijuana is not viewed by many students the way it was viewed by earlier generations. Some do not see it as a serious drug at all. They see it as normal, harmless or no more dangerous than something they could buy in a store if only they were old enough.
I do not believe most students are using marijuana. But I do believe more students have access to it than many parents realize, and I believe many students are far less alarmed by it than their parents would hope. A few years ago, one of my own eighth-grade students was removed from campus for selling edibles to other students. That does not mean every child is doing it. It does mean the problem is real, close and easier to hide than many parents want to believe.
That is why parents cannot afford to live on assumptions. They cannot simply say, “My child would never,” or “That does not happen at my child’s school.” Maybe not. Hopefully not. But hope is not the same thing as attention, and denial is not the same thing as protection.
Time spent with your children is vital, and these days there seems to be less and less time available for parents and children to spend together in meaningful ways. Many families are busy, distracted and scattered. Even when everyone is in the same room, screens can keep people separated. Parents may assume they know what is happening in their children’s lives, while their children are carrying worries, habits, temptations and secrets that never come up in ordinary conversation.
Some parents also miss the ways their own habits can normalize the very things they fear in their children. A child who sees adults constantly reaching for alcohol, medication, entertainment or any other escape may learn more from that example than from any lecture. Children are always being taught. The only question is who is teaching them, and what lesson they are learning.
Moses commanded the children of Israel to never forget what the Lord had taught them in their journey through the wilderness. They were to keep those things in their hearts all the days of their lives, and they were to make them known to their children and to their children’s children.
That command still matters.
We cannot assume our children will pick up faith, wisdom, discipline or discernment by accident. They will not become disciples by osmosis. They need parents, grandparents and faithful adults who will remember what God has done, live as though it matters, and speak of Him naturally and consistently.
That does not mean every conversation has to become a sermon. It means children should see faith lived at home before they hear it preached at church. They should see repentance when we are wrong, gratitude when we are blessed, trust when life is uncertain and obedience when obedience is hard. They should know that following Christ is not merely something we claim on Sunday, but something that shapes our choices every day.
Parents cannot protect their children from every temptation. They cannot control every hallway conversation, every friendship, every screen or every secret. But they can be present. They can be watchful. They can ask better questions. They can listen longer. They can model the life they hope their children will choose.
And most of all, they can teach their children well.
Not merely by warning them what to avoid, but by showing them Who is worth following.
Reflection copyright © 2026 Doug DeBolt and Charles Fulton
Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
