Read
1 Peter 5:1-11
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
1 Peter 5:8

Reflect

One of my favorite movies is “Toy Story,” in part because I could completely identify with the plot. I was a bit of an unusual child because, to me, all of my toys were alive. I wasn’t crazy – I knew they weren’t actually walking and talking. But I imagined them as having personalities and feelings, and when they got damaged, I felt bad because I thought they were hurt.

Another movie with a similar theme is “The Brave Little Toaster,” which extends the notion of objects coming to life to household appliances. Again, I completely identify, because I could absolutely believe that certain objects in the house were alive. Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed how either end of a car looks like a face. Things like that absolutely fuel a bored child’s imagination.

So when I think of iron sharpening iron, I immediately think about how much that would hurt if the knife could actually feel pain. (It’s weird, I know, but go with me on this one.) Solomon’s comparison about how we improve each other relates to the way we would sharpen a knife.

I have a good sharpener in the kitchen, and whenever I use it to sharpen a blade I can hear the grinding and scraping going on. If that was a person it would be extremely painful, because tiny bits of the knife’s edge are literally being ground and shaved off to produce a sharper blade. The sharpening process is not a lot of fun for the knife, but the end result is a cleaner, more effective blade. The alternative is to allow the knife to become dull and ineffective.

Likewise, the sharpening process for a person is not a lot of fun. It’s natural to put up a fight when someone challenges us and makes us face up to flaws and deficiencies. But that’s exactly what a good friend should do when it’s necessary. Some people revel in finding flaws to correct, so that’s not what I’m talking about. Hypercriticism and overcorrection would be like sharpening your knife several times a day. You’d eventually end up grinding your blade down to a nub.

But tactful and targeted correction should be a natural part of a healthy relationship. I’ve been in relationships where I didn’t ever disagree with the other person about anything. It’s not that we didn’t disagree – it’s that both of us were reluctant to say anything for fear of hurting the other’s feelings. That’s like putting up with a dull knife because you don’t want to damage the blade. And anyone who’s ever used knives much will tell you that a dull blade is much more dangerous than a sharp one. This is because you can more easily place too much force on the blade when you’re cutting, causing it to slip and cut yourself accidentally. A dull relationship is more likely to fail than one that’s been sharpened because all of the problems have been buried instead of being handled through a loving sharpening process.

Don’t be afraid to offer tactful and loving sharpening in your friendships and other relationships. People who truly love you will appreciate that you care enough to help them become better and more effective. Likewise, don’t push away the efforts of others who are genuinely trying to help and sharpen you. You’ll never reach the potential that the Lord has in store for you unless your iron is at its razor-sharp best.

(And thanks to my wife, Daryl, for sharpening me every day, and for allowing me to sharpen her. Our marriage is a blessing to me that helps me strive for my best every day.)
Reflection copyright © 2025 Doug DeBolt.