Read
For I desire mercy, not sacrifice,
and acknowledgment of God rather than burnt offerings.
Hosea 6:6 (NIV)
Reflect
Every family is different, but all families have their issues. It would be unusual if they didn’t. After all, any group of people is bound to have differences of opinion on various issues, and those differences can lead to conflict that manifests itself in a variety of ways. Some families even have the so-called “black sheep” – a person who others feel has strayed from the flock in one way or another and from whom the rest of the family remains distant.
This has sadly even happened in my family, and I can’t say we always handled it correctly. Looking back on those moments it’s easy to see how petty our differences were at the time, though we were far too close to things to see the flaws in our own actions. It felt right then, but now it’s clear that the right path was love and acceptance of the person, even if we didn’t really agree with everything that person was doing in their life.
I’ve seen that play out again recently in the life of a friend who has one sibling who has ostracized another because of extreme distances of opinion. Sadly, the angry sibling became very ill and died before there could be any reconciliation. I’ve pondered how the Lord must feel about the way we resolve our differences sometimes.
Honestly, it seems to me that there are clues throughout the New Testament that show exactly how Jesus would have acted in these situations. There’s the story of the woman who was caught in sin and thrown at Jesus’s feet. After a rebuke of those who were seeking her death, Jesus turned to her and basically said, “I don’t condemn you. Now go and turn away from your sin.”
There’s also the story where Jesus met the tax collector named Matthew. Tax collectors were reviled in Israel as thieves and cheats who were in league with the Romans. Yet Jesus spent the evening at Matthew’s home, much to the chagrin of the Pharisees who thought it was beneath a man of God to associate with such people. Jesus chastised them by telling them that they needed to do some Bible study on the meaning of “I desire mercy, not sacrifice.” (Hosea 6:6) And he said, “I’m not here to call people who already know God but for those who don’t know Him.”
And then there’s the parable Jesus told about the Prodigal Son. This young man broke his father’s heart by taking his inheritance early and blowing all of it on wine, women and song. Only after he was ultimately humiliated did the son return home. And what of the Father? Did he wait for the son to say I’m sorry before he let him into the house? No, he ran to the son at the first sight of the young man and embraced him before he could even utter a word. The father was sitting, waiting for the first sign of repentance and kept looking for the first opportunity to reconcile with his boy.
Also, recall the story of the unforgiving servant. There, the servant was forgiven a debt that was insurmountable, but he refused to forgive a comparably minuscule debt of a fellow servant. That servant’s refusal to forgive his fellow man incurred the wrath of the king who had at first been merciful, and the full debt was restored. Jesus’ message in that story was, “So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”
We serve a God of love, mercy and grace, and He calls us to pursue those qualities in our own lives. It’s not that we should openly ignore and embrace sin. Jesus didn’t even do that. But He did love the people who were still engaged in sin, knowing that love – not condemnation – was the best path to reconciliation. Thank God the Lord doesn’t take the same attitude with us that we sometimes take with others.
Today, I pray that you are at peace with your family and that they are happy and healthy. But if you have a “black sheep,” perhaps today is the day to reach out in love and to begin the process of healing with that person. In our own lives, no measure of hurt that we caused our Heavenly Father could keep Him from extending to us His grace, love and mercy – and that mercy was ours for the taking before we even knew to look for it. Mirror the actions of the Father by doing the same for the people in your life who need His love and reconciliation. It could be that all they’re waiting for is a call from you to start that process.
Reflection copyright © 2024 Doug DeBolt.
