There’s one question I absolutely hate being asked in class, and oddly enough, it’s the one students ask more than any other.
In my classroom, every request has to include the word please. It’s a simple rule about basic manners. If a student asks for something without it, I simply pretend not to hear them until they try again the right way.
But there’s one question that keeps coming up.
I’ll be in the middle of a discussion. Students are answering questions. Ideas are bouncing around the room. And suddenly a hand shoots up — usually belonging to a student who has not shown the slightest interest in raising that hand for the discussion itself.
I call on them.
“Can I go to the bathroom?”
And that’s when the fun begins. Sometimes I say, “What?” Other times I’ll look at them and ask, “You want to use a can?”
That usually causes a moment of confusion.
Then the student tries again. “May I go to the bathroom?” Which is technically better grammar, but it still isn’t quite right.
So I say, “You want to wait until May?”
At this point you can almost see the gears turning in the student’s head. They rewind the conversation, trying to figure out what went wrong.
And finally, it comes. “May I please go to the bathroom?”
Now we’re getting somewhere.
The truth is, I’m not really trying to run a grammar seminar in the middle of class. What I’m trying to teach is something simpler — and maybe more important.
How we ask for things matters. A little politeness goes a long way in life. Doors open more easily. Conversations go better. People are more willing to help.
And if it takes a few terrible puns about cans and the month of May to help that lesson stick, well… that’s a price I’m willing to pay.
Copyright © 2026 Doug DeBolt.
